September 11, 2024
DEAR ABBY: A close male friend, “Will,” ended our friendship without warning.
I didn’t know he had such strong feelings about my current arrangement.
I have been dating a married man, “Bart,” whose wife suggested he get himself a girlfriend if he wanted sex/intimacy/companionship.
She also told him she would “never want to sleep with him even if he paid her,” to put it bluntly.
At first, I thought this was weird—I mean, no woman in her right mind would give her husband carte blanche, but the more I got to know Bart’s wife, “Jane,” the more I realize she’s one of a kind.
Jane’s a straight shooter and always keeps it 100 with Bart. The first time I hung out with them as a group, she candidly revealed to me and a group of friends that she lost her mojo after having three babies and over a decade of non-existent foreplay.
Jane indicated to me that their arrangement had been a subject of lengthy conversation and although her marriage to Bart was non-negotiable, her marital duty was.
When I raised concerns about hurting Bart, I thought a platonic relationship with him may have been more suitable.
But since Bart’s needs were explicitly unmet elsewhere, this option was less than ideal.
Now I find myself at the other side of Will’s resentment with little understanding of his stance while also considering my relationship with Bart, wondering if this unusual tryst takes me further away or closer to what I’m seeking.
Has any other reader ever experienced a romantic relationship like this one?
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